The Swamp Hermit's Report

Penis Shrinker/Reducer…

Posted in Uncategorized by Karmi on May 25, 2004

i’m always getting unwanted email, and last year i got one for “Penis Enlarger”. That email got me to thinking, and i did some research to see if anyone was offering something that would be more useful to men like me…as in a Penis Shrinker/Reducer. Guess what i found??? Apparently no one had ever invented something that could shrink or reduce the size of a penis!?! Plenty of modern-day Foot Shrinking businesses (dating back to early China & early Japan)…there’s head-shrinking, tummy and chin tucking, Breast Reductions, stomach and thigh shrinking, but no Penis Shrinking businesses!?!?!?!

Men with a small to medium penis never have to take showers in the shower room alone, and they don’t seem to mind having lockers next to each other. However, they will not even take a locker in the same isle or row where my locker is, and they’ll even double up or triple up in other lockers even though there are plenty of empty lockers next to mine!?! They either rush to shower or wait until i’ve showered?!?!

If you think that having a large penis is just a handicap in the locker room, then you are mistaken, and probably never had a woman tell you, “YOU AIN’T STICKING *THAT* THING IN ME!!!

Inventing a Penis Shrinker/Reducer ain’t easy to do, and forget finding volunteers to test it. Anyway, humble me has invented a Penis Shrinker/Reducer and am now testing it on myself. i still can’t believe that something like this has never been invented!?! If there is a Market for a “Penis Enlarger”, then a Market for a Penis Shrinker/Reducer should also exist…so to speak.

If the test works within the next month, i will start marketing, “Karmi’s *NEW* Penis Shrinker/Reducer”, and humble me may be very wealthy by this time next year.

Dualistic Inventor of “Karmi’s *NEW* Penis Shrinker/Reducer”,

Swåmp Hermî†

5 Responses

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  1. Trevgarrr said, on October 14, 2008 at 4:21 pm

    I know how ya feel! all the good girls don’t want it and all the sluts do. If this thing works let me know.

  2. baal said, on November 28, 2010 at 10:11 am

    there is a business for penis reduction. some companies carry a spray, some use pills, and the other is surgery. it’s not as dangerous as enlargement, ironically enough. i just worry that girls will use it as a form of revenge :P

  3. Casey said, on February 11, 2011 at 9:50 pm

    FOR REAL! Any time I have sex with my girlfriend it has to be really slow start or it’s really painful for her. I would love something like that. I was thinking of something to slide over it at the base to at least shorten it… idk what to do about girth… ffffuuuu Good luck man.

  4. p said, on December 11, 2011 at 1:33 pm

    i’ll volunteer for a reduction
    pjhogan1971@gmail.com

  5. esclavitopr said, on February 21, 2013 at 6:00 pm

    me too I ‘ve been looking info about this theme without success


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